Monday, August 31, 2009


So, after all that, I have completed the first draft of my first ever FEATURE LENGTH SCRIPT! What was supposed to be a five-day-feature morphed into several months. It is full of typos, and plot flaws and missing scenes and lame dialogue, and I couldn't be happier! Completion was always the goal with this project, and though it is nowhere near "polished and let someone read it" finished, the fact that the draft is complete and tangible makes me happier than I could express.

So, now I'm going to celebrate by printing out two copies. One for myself and one for Derek. Soon it will be a mess of red corrective pen strokes, and I'm really OK with that. Nothing could ruin today's triumph. Except maybe a giant tsunami that engulfs Vancouver. Or a forced "wear your bikini to work" day. Or a dinner of boiled cabbage and goat liver. Ok, lots could ruin it, but so far we're good.

Time to celebrate!

Losing my?

Mind? Sanity? Sense of self? Understanding of this plot?

All of the above?

I'm currently trying to channel a bulldozer, plowing through the wreckage, hoping its smoother on the other side once I've crossed. A sidebar on that: bulldozers are not particularly attractive, and neither are writers who are mid-third act and forgetting how to connect the threads of the plot that are still hanging. There is ink on my glasses from an exploded pen. Need I say more?

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Three More Reviews


Good fun straight through
subtle seduces intense
Tunes lacked Quentin's flare


Tale artfully told
Challenges Western pacing
Vengeance reigns supreme


Sweet and Savory
Child's story superior
Streep sweeps us away

I suppose I could at least TRY and stay consistent with my formatting. But life lived only for rules is boring.

Saturday, August 22, 2009

Haiku Movie Reviews, to date

District 9
Enlightened effects / great story with new techniques / paving a new road.

The Ugly Truth
Butler Sans Accent / Too many mind games, no punch / Tired jokes with a twist

Engaging premise / Beautifully juxtaposed / A quiet triumph

Sub effects for plot / Comic relief on steroids / Why Michael Bay Why?

Public Enemies
Well acted and scored / True story pacing meets Mann / Too much handy-cam.

Monday, August 17, 2009

My Head is Full

My head is full tonight.
Full of things that could be, should be, but will they ever be?
Am I working hard enough or just wasting the opportunity? Does it make a difference if no one ever sees what is inside of me?
Or Should I let it be, just for him, for me?
Something that no one else can ever see?
I want to let it out, but inside it is still perfect, basking in amniotic memory.
When it breaks free it is filthy, ugly, scary, changed from its strong consistency.
Becoming something I’m afraid to be.
Where is the courage that yesterday promised me?
Where is the discipline I claimed to see?
I guess there is nothing left but to just be.
I hope you’re with me.

Sunday, August 16, 2009

Making Choices and Meeting Friends

Life is a series of small breaks. You know what else it is? A choice. Every single moment of every single day we are making choices. Am I going to sit down or stand up? Am I going to have the cod or the halibut? Am I going to put myself out there and try something scary, or underestimate myself and stay safe. These choices will define the experiences that we have each day, and what we miss out on. This week has been one of many experiences for me.

First, I have had the pleasure of experiencing Vancouver through the eyes of my in-laws, and in so doing rediscovered the beautiful place in which I live. Where I tend to get distracted by the business of my week and forget to stop and let the sounds of the ocean wash it all away, they are enthralled by everything they see because they do not have the option of rushing past it on their way to a lunch or in rush hour traffic. It was really nice to see it from their perspective.

Second, I went against my doctor's orders and walked all weekend on a foot that should have experienced only ice, elevation and a considerable amount of pain killers. I chose to do this because I could not bear to sit at home and miss out on the first set of experiences mentioned. We don't get to spend enough time with our out of town family, and I could not stand to be left out of the equation. Even now as I sit here with the ice and the throbbing, I don't regret it.

Third, I had the opportunity to meet one of my favourite bloggers. Someone whose courage and attitude has inspired me with every post he has written. You can check out Matt Logelin's blog here. We spent Thursday night downtown hanging out with Matt, and on one of the most difficult nights of the year for him, he still managed to listen to our goals and dreams and encourage us in our chosen career path, about our marriage and our future. He allowed us to pick his brain about his many experiences since losing Liz, and the arrival of Madeline, and he was genuine and friendly. I only hope we were able to show him as great of an evening as he did us. We had a great time.

The choices I'm making this week? 1. A little less fried food, a little more fruit. 2. Rest, ice and elevation (doctor's orders, for real this time). 3. No underestimation. I am just going to go for it.

Monday, August 10, 2009

3 Virtues and a Flaw

Something we do at work when we are trying to correct a behavior is to give the person in the hot-seat three positive focuses before we offer the one (and only one) "opportunity" that they should be focussing on. It sounds like a load of corporate hooey - yes I said it - up front, but mostly, it just works. I've found it a good excercise for myself when I get overwhelmed about the endless list of non-virtues I posess (sorry, no spellcheck on my blackberry) so here goes my public display of affection for myself, the main focus being my flaw.

Virtue #1. I'm Deep.

It sounds ridiculous to say it out loud. Along the lines of the newest celebutante on late night who says "everybody thinks I'm like, so shallow, but I really think about things, like, world hunger, and people who have to shop at like, Wal-Mart. I obviously have layers." But I do actually do a lot of thinking and analysing, and I hope it shines through on occassion.

Virtue #2. I am aware.

I am not one of those people who is blissfully ignorant of the solo mother who is trying to coral her stroller and second squirming two year old through the not-so-automatic doors. I'm usually present enough to help someone who's dropped a bag of groceries, or left their car keys on a table at the restaurant. I like to notice things (note: texting and awareness can almost never co-exist)

Virtue #3. I'm funny. Whether intentional or (more likely) unintentional, I can crack people up. I try, and often fail, through my writing, and I definitely make an effort in person. The main detractor to this is when I incidentally cross a line or step on some toes, though I find most of my friends and family to be extremely gracious in these situations.

And finally the easy part. The above was practically torture. I am not practiced at saying positive things (read: bragging) about myself.

The Flaw: I'm extremely impatient.

The kind of impatient that misses a spectacular sunset because she was too set on getting gelato to hold off for five minutes and watch. The kind who can't enjoy a still moment without knowing its expiry second, and what's next on the agenda. The kind who rushes her extremely patient husband out of the house to go do errands when they could be enjoying another cup of coffee and an episode of The Honeymooners on a Sunday morning.

People always say "well at least I can admit it about myself" I think what good is admitting it unless I can do something about it. My problem is I don't know how to change.

Clean and dirty laundry now aired, I urge you to undertake this exercise, and give yourself some positive feedback before focussing on one thing you want to change. I want to hear some self-bragging! If only to validate my own overshare.

Also this post was done via PDA so I take no responsibility for its choppy feel. Embrace it.

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

Reasons I Didn't Write This Week

Everyday I come up with a new justification for my lack of writing. Usually it goes a little something like this:

Little Voice in my head: "Rachel, I noticed your screenplay is at the same page count as yesterday, why is that do you think?"

Me: "Well, I was scheduled for a 9:30 start at work, and we both know that I am a terrible morning writer. Then I had a birthday dinner to go to tonight and I didn't get home until late, so I figured I'd go full board tomorrow."

Little Voice: "Hey Rachel, I was wondering if you hit your five page goal today?"

Me: "Oh! Well, technically I didn't actually hit the keyboard, but I did a lot of mental writing. So don't worry, work has been done.

LV: "Mental writing?"

Me: "Yeah, where you think about what you want to write when you have time to sit down next. Mental writing is the new five pages!"

LV: "Rachel, its Saturday. I was really hoping I'd see that progress we've been talking about."

Me: "Oh hey, yeah, I'm just really not feeling very well today. I think I ate some questionable food. Really the only thing that can help me today is gingerale and reality television."

LV: "Time well spent."

Me: "Was that sarcasm?"

LV: "Caught that did you?"

Me: "Hey Little Voice, aren't you going to harass me today?"

LVIMH: "What, you don't think I deserve a day off? I'm part of a union you know!"

Me: "Whoah, hey, relax!"

LV: "Now that you mention it..."

Me: "No way, you lost your chance. I'm going out"

LV: "Rachel, I'm serious. You owe me about six billion pages today."

Me: "Right, I know. Listen though, I'm thinking I'm just going to wait until after our company comes and goes next week. I have a lot of errands to do before then."

LV: "Rachel?"

Me: "Dude, I told you. Company, errands. I'll just be stressed if I start writing now."

LV: "Yeah, I'm thinking a little stress may be healthy for you at this point, rather than the utter complacancy we've been experiencing of late."

Me: "What? Sorry? I was staring at the wall for a minute and tuned you out."

LV "So, you want to be a burger jockey?"

Me: "What? No!

LV: "Oh, sorry my mistake. WRITE!"

Me: "Yeah, I'm pretty sure I need a new project."

LV: "I quit."